By far, the best advice I ever received was to exclude toxic people from my life. Toxic people are jealous-judgmental people. These types of people can be incredibly toxic because they do not want to see anyone around them happy.
Toxic people tend to have an internal self-hate that introduces itself as jealousy. That jealousy turns into judgement, gossip, and criticism. They will always find the bad in everyone. Toxic people are manipulative and take absolutely no responsibility for their actions or feelings.
You must understand a toxic person will not change and you can not change them. They might even try and pull you into their world of drama. If you don’t distance your self and set boundaries you will become just like them.
Toxic People Will Stress You Out
Whether the toxic person is a co-worker, a spouse, a sibling, or even a parent it is very important that you distance yourself. This can be incredibly hard especially if it is someone you care deeply about. However, if you don’t find a way, it will only hurt you in the end.
As I mentioned above toxic people only want to see others hurt and fall down. They do not want to see anyone succeed especially in areas they can’t get ahead in.
Do you know someone that gossips? Unfortunately, this could even be someone in your church. I do and to be honest I had to worry every time I left the room what was being said about me. I had to be extremely careful what I said around these people because somehow I always got drug into the middle of some drama.
As an Introvert I will never volunteer information. I will however, give you an honest answer to a question. The toxic people in my life would use this against me and gossip about me behind my back. I often felt like I had to defend myself and always had to answer to everyone for everything.
I felt like I was being questioned to death every time they was around. Like they was digging for information to fill their gossip jar.
I found myself giving an answer why I couldn’t or didn’t want to do something. Instead of just saying no and letting it go I would give a reason why I couldn’t with a drawn out explanation to follow. It got so bad I started doing this in all areas of my life.
Get Rid Of The Negative and Get Your Life Back
When I finally realized I don’t like drama. Nor do I want any part of it I made the decision to distance myself from anyone who was negative and loved drama. At first it was hard because they would make me feel bad.
Just recently I had a family member delete me on Facebook because I didn’t want to be tagged in an argument that involved my mom. At first I was hurt and then I quickly reminded myself it was for the best.
Three years ago I made the decision to be more positive no matter what came my way. I also made the decision to never explain myself again. My business is my business. If I want to share it then that is on me. I will no longer allow anyone else to share my story and neither should you.
Something you must remember is that you can not change anyone but you can change you. If you want someone else to change then be that person you want them to be. Be the positive role model.
Only you can make the necessary decisions to move on or away from the toxic situations that are holding you back. If you know someone who gossips then you need to distance yourself; after all what are they saying about you?
If they are miserable and not going anywhere in life that is their choice. It’s your choice to move on and let go. If anything, you can always pray for them. Praying for someone who has done you wrong can be so hard but oh so satisfying at the same time!
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